No, I haven’t turned into Roadrunner. Thank God because I would not be able to outrun Wylie Coyote at this point. The beep I’m referring to is the sound my cart made as I backed up. Last night my foot was hurting more than it ever has. The pain got so bad while I was out shopping that I had to get one of those motorized carts. I’m not proud of this fact.
Those things are tough to drive. I’m pretty sure I frightened other patrons because if I had to back up to get something, I would laugh hysterically as the cart beeped beeped beeped all the way home. The cart also didn’t have a tight turn radius, and I kept taking out displays or knocking into the shelf. My concerned roommate laughed and snapped pictures from afar. He’d also jump out of my way as I tried to navigate the aisles.
If you see me around town in one of these things (or at the Grand Canyon as the hover round commercials show), it’s best to give me a wide berth. Hopefully, I’ll return to being fully mobile and cart-free very soon. For now, the captain of the SS Injury Wagon is signing off.